Voyage to the Planet of Teenage Cavewomen

Written by David Strege

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Directed by Joshua Kennedy of Gooey Films his 3rd film from 2011 filmed in his senior year of highschool using class mates and teachers again he shows his passion for classic films except this time he pays homage to the badly dubbed Italian science fiction stone age flicks of the 70s he has purposely lip synced this film just for you!

Twin planets from outer space are hurtling towards earth at atomic rates.

As the starts a certain bookish looking professor name of Professor Brian Schector from the University of Nevada explain to us the film is based an something that could scientifically happen.  When heroshima was bombed with nuclear explosions the earth shifted a few inches from its orbit.  Newtons 3rd law was for everye action there is an equal and opposite reaction. As we watch two hurtling planets crash into a small earth ship containing Leutenant Lockhart after wards the movie begins…

Commander Scott Mitchel in DC has been notified of the planets and he has only 39 hours to take care of the situation.

Captain Matt Sullivan is called in and  sent to the two planets to evacuate the planets before earth destroys them with nuclear blasts.  Manned with his team ‘Doc’ and Tony he accepts the mission at hand.

It is as they are in space we notice the badly dubbed parts begin it’s funny watching the lips move as the words come later again haha lol.

I mean you can tell the inside of the ship is tinfoil and you can see parts are made of cds and plastic parts.  Meanwhile inhabitants of the planet absolutely gorgeous females have noticed their arrival and have informed their queen Zora.  The two races Vigans and Bavans have had an alliance for years but recent battling unbeknownst to them has sent each of their planets hurtling them to their deaths.  The Vigans are a race of females that have been with out men for centuries… Zora a female from the Vigan race is planning to open a portal to the Bavans world to over throw their queen and become the bavans queen.

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As the men search the planet they begin to think the planet is devoid until they meet Tanna of the Vigans but as they are speaking Prima a younger Vigan the sister of Ylva is attacked by a creature and the men kill it which gains the Vigans Queens trust.

The men are brought to Ylva whose surprised they haven’t started fighting yet.  Zora plans to over throw Ylva their queen by siding with the bavans. But her fellow follower doesn’t agree in the end so she kills her and as she opens the portal the invasion starts early and the bavans betray Zora anyways killing her not needing her help anymore.  Guess her plans to be their queen are to be no more. Will the men of earth be able to save the vigans now from the Bavans who’s minds have succumbed to radiation poisoning from their own atomic explosions? Will Captain Matt Sullivan be able to save the Vigans before the earth destroys the planets?

The men are falling in love with their Vigan girls will they be able to rescue Queen Ylva once she’s been kidnapped by the Bavans?

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I thoroughly enjoyed this film all due to the bad dubbing reminds me of watching goszilla films that modern technology has erased it was all part of the enjoyment of the films to begin with lol well done Kennedy.

I give this film a 4 out of 5 star rating especially for bringing back the art of badly dubbing.  The women were pretty and some acting of Zora could have been more enthusiastic but I enjoyed the movie in its entirety.

I recommend this film for those who also enjoyed chess badly dubbed scantily clad women with possible scenarios.

Starring Joshua Kennedy as Matt Sullivan, April Michelle Gomez as Queen Lyna, Xavier Aguilar as Tony Jackson, Michael Moralez as Richard ‘Doc’ Horton, Leslie Ann Leal as Prima, Viviana L. Rodriguez as Tanna, Cassandra Dean as Zora, Ismael Rivera as Commander Mitchell, Shelby Duarte as Ylva, Ralph Haskins as Dr. Brian Schecter.

 

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